Helplessness

I found out last night that one of my best friends tried to kill herself on Monday. What the hell? Why? I don't want to lose her! I wish I could take all her pain for her so that she could be happy again. Is there something I could've said before? Or done? Were there signs years ago that I missed? Is there something I can do now? I feel helpless. I can't physically make her take her meds or watch her 24-7 to make sure she never tries it again. What do I do? I don't know what I would do if I lost her. She's been by my side since I was little. She's my other half.

I pray that now she'll wake up and get the help she needs. I just want her to be happy again. I want us to grow old together, laughing about the old days and how things used to be. It scares me to think I almost lost her and I didn't even know.

What is going on?